No, no no it’s not like that. Did not wanna sound morbid, and certainly did not mean to click bait you in that way either. The thing is, having been based in SFO for the past seven years, I tend to keep SFO for granted. I come in, fly, land, get out. That’s it. Having seen a few of these airports all over the world, I gotta say SFO is grossly underrated.
SFO ranks number 2 as the most weather delayed airport in the US, according to a report by the Weather Channel, only trailing Newark airport by a hair. Low visibility, because of fog is the main culprit of these weather delays. It only takes one cute cloud to throw a temper tantrum and there goes your travel plans.So what if you are hit with that weather delay and have to spend a few unplanned hours in SFO? Do you sit by the gate and contemplate suicide? No. Unless you got some foofoo credit card that’s gonna get you in those different airport lounges, sure you’ll be fine. But what if you’re just an average joe like you and me? Well, let this be your unofficial guide while you celebrate SFO Airport appreciation day.
SECRET PEET’S COFFEE LOCATION (Terminal 2, inside security)
So you’re at the gate and the gate agent just told you about the delay. Now you want coffee. You see Peet’s. Then you see the long ass line. Now you’re really mad. Relax. If you look behind you, there’s another Peet’s coffee just behind gate 58. There’s no one there.
BAY AREA SPORTS HALL OF HAME (Between Terminal 1 and 2, inside security)
Bandwagon Warrior Fan? Brush up on your Warrior knowledge by visiting the plaques of Mitch Richmond, Chris Mullin and other Bay Area sports Hall of Famers at the walkway between Terminals 1 and 2.
AMOURA EMPLOYEE CAFE (Between Terminals 1 and 2, outside security)
Looking for something else besides Starbucks and wanna save some money? Head over to Amoura employee cafe. Reasonably priced meals and daily specials, plus a seating area that’s a little quieter. Now, I should have asked if this spot is exclusively for employees only, but I have seen people not in uniform eating there, so you can try. My favorite day is Wednesday for their Mongolian Beef over rice special.
FIFI NEEDS TO PEEPEE? PET RELIEF AREAS (Terminals 1, 2 and 3)
According to a New York Times’ article there are actually more dogs than children in San Francisco, which to me does not come as a surprise. Naturally, SFO has 4 spots for your little Fifi to peepee. Three of the spots are outside security, at the courtyards of Terminals 1, 2 and 3, and one inside security in Terminal 1. Please bring your pets over to these places, instead of laying paper towels inside the lavatories of airplanes, or worse just let them take a crap in the middle of the aisle. (Yes, I have seen these happen)
FREE PARKING. IN SAN FRANCISCO. I’M NOT FUCKING KIDDING. (Short Term Parking)
Usually, the only “free” you will ever get in San Francisco are Hepatitis C, from stepping on a syringe in downtown SF, or a free peep show from seeing something pornographic (and disgusting) at BART. But I kid you not, PARKING IS FREE AT THE SAN FRANCISCO AIRPORT. But with one big caveat, it’s only FOR 30 MINUTES. Do you know how much damage you can do it 30 minutes? This is perhaps the best deal in the whole Bay Area.
YOGA ROOM (Terminals 2 and 3, inside security)
Like Gym, me and Yoga are not friends so, I have never seen the inside of this yoga room, but I see it from the outside every single time. After your rub down and Swedish massage from your friendly neighborhood TSA agent, finish it up with downward dog at the Yoga room. In Terminal 2, its immediately after security to your right. Namaste.
SFO MUSEUM EXHIBITS (All over the airport)
Well, this is not really a secret, but it is important to note that these exhibits are all over the airport. Currently, I pass by the Japanese Cat exhibits everyday, and saw the antique coin operated machines at the International Terminal last week. It’s a great way to kill time and take in a little culture while your at it. Click here to find out exact locations and current exhibits.
NAPA FARMS MARKET (International Terminal G and Terminal 2, inside security)
Who knew airport food could ever taste this good? Healthy, quality options are abundant here. What to have? a half plate of tender pulled pork with a side of their heavenly mac and cheese and cauliflower rice.
They also have a nice gift section that carries a wide array of local, artisanal gifts like soaps, chocolates and those amazing pure soy candles if you’re thinking of a gift for that person you’re about to see in a few hours.
SLEEPY AND STINKY? FRESHEN UP! (International Terminal, outside security)
You just traveled half way around the world, from a humid tropical country, stuck in the middle seat, between two overweight stinky guys, jet lagged and you can’t check in early at your hotel. What to do? Well SFO has Freshen up, a place where you can take a shower, iron your clothes, and take a few zzzzs before your next task, navigating San Francisco traffic.
SECRET GARDEN (Terminal 1, outside security)
Want some greenery and some fresh air before breathing in recirculated air from a metal tube? Head over to the SFO secret garden, a nice, clean and landscaped oasis where most employees hang out while they think about wrong career decisions.
D and K FOOD TRUCK (Parking structure, outside Terminal 3)
Secretive, cheap and good are qualities I look for not only in my hookers but also my food, and D and K food truck fits the bill. Now it’s a pain in the ass to look for but I know it’s where the SFO taxis park by Terminal 3. Go outside, towards the spiral parking structure, and when you see some smoking Asian taxi drivers, ask for exact directions. I told you it was secretive. When you finally see it, a sense of achievement abounds your soul. Once there, they have all kinds of stuff, from breakfast sandwich croissants, to spam and eggs over rice, philly cheese steaks, to chicken skewers. Again, its secretive, cheap and good, like a good hooker. The best kept secret of SFO Airport. So the next time you get stuck in SFO and have a few hours to kill, don’t take it out on the gate agent, or your flight attendant. Get up, walk around and appreciate the beauty of the San Francisco International Airport.
EXIT ROW BRIEFINGS:
- No smoking at any of the terminals, only at designated areas outside.
- The Airtrain is usually closed at night for construction and repairs.
- There are water fountains all over the airport, where you can refill your water bottle. San Francisco water is one of the cleanest in the world.
- Traveling internationally? Download the mobile passport app. SFO is one of the few airports in the US to have this feature. Gets you through customs almost as fast as Global Entry and its FREE!
Stewardude 